Sometimes I just don't want to write down anything anymore for fear of distorting whatever it is that's been going through my head recently. There's always that risk of misinterpreting things, especially in knowing how my brain and my heart tend to speak two different languages in an incredible number of dialects. While they can understand each other to some extent, they never fail to clash at some point in the intersection.
But that's just how it is. It now feels stupid realizing how I keep trying to rationalize my emotions regardless of how shallow they may appear to be at first, only to find myself trying to determine how I feel about these rationalizations afterwards. It's like trying to understand a language with a completely different one over and over again in hopes of getting even the vaguest understanding of both sides. But then all you end up with is confusion-- the perfect infusion of mixed thoughts and feelings.
Nothing's just as clear as it used to be. I miss seeing rainbows in black and white.
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